Faith in Nothing

I was pulling my hair out , figuratively and so was my Superman (his, not mine)...Nothing we had tried and nothing we had done for months had changed anything and my superhero's illness just kept taking a stronger and stronger hold. He was hanging on to reality by his finger nails and I was preparing myself for the worst...

Prayer, blessings, fasting and pure plain grit felt like they little if no effect on our lives and we kept reaching a new low.

Our options, at least medically were/are limited and medication only takes you so far...FRUSTRATION was an understatement.

In the days leading up to our visit with Superman's Dr again. I prayed a lot, mostly out of duty, rather than faith. Their wasn't much else I could do. And the impression I had over and over again was nothing, you need to do nothing. But how can nothing help, fix, or change anything...We have to do something? Nothing continued to be the answer.

But the doctor is just going to want to try a new med or the suggest ECT,  that's what doctors do, it's what they are supposed to do. How would he agree to do nothing?, I kept telling myself...absolutely fearing the road ahead.

"Don't throw me under the bus!" Grant says as we enter the doctors office...He always says that. "Of course I won't" I promise with my fingers crossed and a slight smirk on my face. He knows I will completely honest and if that involves a large passenger vehicle, so be it. He's the one that asked me to come with him.

We discussed the last few crazy, out-of-control, roller coaster weeks and then we discussed options...

As each option was discussed each thing was ruled out, for now...Eventually we all came to the decision that we needed to do nothing new, for now. Stick with the one med that works most of the time, with no side effects and see how the illness copes over the next few months. Grant is not the typical patient, but that doesn't surprise me he's not really the typical superhero either.

Nothing is the answer, for now

The last two weeks haven't been perfect, but they have been better. A chance to take a deep breath and get our feet under us again.

Sometimes doing nothing takes all the faith in the world, but I'm glad I listened.