My Perfect Family... Talk :)

I spoke in Sacrament Meeting last Sunday, When the bishop gave me the topic of strong family values, I started to laugh, I thought, Shouldn't you find someone a little more qualified....someone who comes from a normal family....doesn't yell at their kids....owns an apron???

And because I had no one to bribe with a milkshake , I wrote the talk myself :) Instead of copying the whole talk here (which nobody wold read any way) I'll post two things, the Cole's notes version....


My favourite quote is by Elder Joseph B Wirthlin.....

“The church is not a place where perfect people gather to say perfect things, or have perfect thoughts, or have perfect feelings. The Church is a place where imperfect people gather to provide encouragement, support, and service to each other as we press on in our journey to return to our Heavenly Father.”

I would like to take slight literary licence here and change two words…reading the quote again…..

“The FAMILY is not a place where perfect people gather to say perfect things, or have perfect thoughts, or have perfect feelings. The FAMILY is a place where imperfect people gather to provide encouragement, support, and service to each other as we press on in our journey to return to our Heavenly Father.”

In The Family A Proclamation to the World: it says…

Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.

Successful families….not perfect families….

I also shared a fb message I had received from my sister the night before...

"Just got a call from Dad's Home Teacher...."

What?? Home Teachers?! My Dad has not been active in the church in more than six decades...But some how his ward in Southern California (the same ward, my sister and I had left 25 years ago) had tracked him down. For the last five or so months his Home Teachers had visited him frequently. These home teachers were able to relay valuable information to my sister about my Dad's last few months in California....these men provided watch care for my Dad, that no one else had been able to do....

Our prayers for help were being answered long before we knew, Never underestimate the value of the work we do as Home Teachers, Visiting Teachers, and as a Ward Family....


At least I'll be off the hook for speaking in Church for six months :)

Cardboard H*LL

We move. A lot. I counted, twelve and now thirteen times in the last nineteen years. See its a lot. No we are not running from the authorities, although no matter how stealthy we are the rug rats still manage to find the new house ;).....

We started packing this week thus entering the period known as cardboard hell....It isn't until I begin putting all our worldly possessions in boxes I feel the full effects of having five don't-you-dare-throw-the-mother's-day-card-I-made-you-in-grade-three hoarders, I mean children. Even with my constant need to dejunk, we have SO MUCH STUFF.

What's with tape and pens, Even on a normal day our house is a vortex for them, but then we start packing, I buy eight rolls of tape and half a dozen magic markers and still spend more time searching for the tape and pens than I do actually packing...

Then there is the dejunking dilemma...will my mother-in-law notice if I get rid of her Christmas gift from 1996?...do we really need two coffee makers (no, none of us drink coffee)....and whats with all the shoes...

At least our time in cardboard hell is limited to the next four weeks...then we will never. move. again. Until next time :)

Admittedly Hard

I think I have some how floated through February...pretending I could handle everything thrown at us. Its hard not to feel overwhelmed...

The last several mornings, my Sister has related to me the increasingly odd and concerning behavior my father has experienced as well as several falls....This afternoon Kelli called me to let me know that Dad was being admitted to the hospital, the first time since his bout with polio over 62 years ago...

Dad has pneumonia, dehydration, and some kind of other infection....his MRI showed significant brain atrophy and other issues, his chest x-ray also concerning...Dad has lost more than 6 lbs in as many days...

I know its a standard question " Would your father want a DNR?" But when Kelli relayed it to me. I started to cry. At least Kelli and I are on the same page and I have a sister that I trust with any decision...

"Should I come??" Its a question I've battled with since the beginning of the month. Kelli knows me well. "Robin, he's not Dad anymore...The trauma might be overwhelming" Watching mom die was horrible, it has left me with some deep scars. "Do what you need to, I will completely understand" We feel its okay for me to wait and see what the next few days bring...

I hate this, I hope that medication and care get him feeling better, but my biggest prayer is that he doesn't needlessly suffer.

Why is this so hard....

The BBBeach is CCCCold

Living on the Island, sunshine is in short supply this time of year. So when it does shine we take advantage of it....

Don't for one second think its WARM when the sun shines, the gale force winds at Kye Bay made it feel well below freezing. Our afternoon beach adventure lasted less than thirteen minutes and by then I could no longer bend, much less feel my fingers...The superman was the only intelligent one among us, he stayed in the car.

I never get tired of the beach....

At the Radar Station above Kye Bay

Let's Just Skip It....

I wish I could just write a funny story about how Dallyn came home and told me all the pick up lines he had learned at school today "My mouth is full of Skittles, wanna taste the rainbow" was the tamest one....sigh. Or how Holly and I went through Mickey D's drive-thru and as we were driving away Holly says "Mom, what's that cool airy feeling...."Holly your window is still down?!" "Oh sorry, it's dark, I couldn't tell"


But February 22 is a day I have spent years trying to figure out how to skip....The anniversary of my mom's death,will never be my favourite day...When I opened my email at six this morning, I couldn't believe what I was reading...

"Just FYI, Dad fell in the bathroom early this morning...Couldn't get up, was like that for 45 minutes before I found him, doesn't have any serious injuries, but is severely confused...I'll let you know after I call the DR..."

What is with the deja vu with my parents...9 years ago this morning my mom passed away after falling in the bathroom while in care...

If this had happened just a few weeks ago in his own home, we wouldn't have found Dad for who knows how long.

A multitude of tests were run on Monday and my sister did manage to get my Dad to his MRI this afternoon, in spite of the early morning drama. A home care assessment will now be done on Friday to help support him until..... Now I am just praying that we can find some answers, that explain his rapid decline and help us find the right level of care...

My crazy, wish- I- had- skipped- day continued....A few important lessons learned...

Kindness softens hearts and fashions friends

Its all in the delivery

Eat your Triple-O's double cheese burger while its still HOT :)

When someone offers to buy you pizza for dinner...LET THEM

Next year I vote Hawaii in February, especially the third week of the month :)

Miracle Worker

I've always since becoming an adult, have deeply respected my sister, but today she moved up to near god like status in my books....My favorite sister was able to get my very confused and often defiant Dad into a doctors office (Kelli's DR agreed to see Dad) for the first time in more than thirty years. Yup, she's a miracle worker.

Dad kicked up a fuss, refused to shower and it was pretty iffy all morning if the said doctors visit would happen...but it did.

They did a full physical, blood work, a confusion and depression test, a chest x-ray etc....he has an MRI on Wednesday and sees the podiatrist....Its a start and I hope that we can quickly be led in a direction that will get my Dad the help he has need for so long.

My Dad apparently tolerated the office better than we thought until the Chest X-Ray and EKG....."Robin, there was cursing, lots of cursing" Kelli said....I started to laugh,{ I too, can say the occasional good curse word :) (you know, child birth, spill kool-aid on the carpet, stubbing a toe) I can't help my genetics ;) } But my sister rarely swears (see, god-like)  PLUS she lives in a very conservative, very Mormon, very small town. "Sorry Kelli, I'm sure they've heard it before..." "I'm not too sure about that"....

I am just so thankful to Kelli and all she has done to bring my Dad home and keep him safe....She is an absolute miracle worker in my books :)

Dallyn`s a Deacon

Today was a special day for Dallyn. He was ordained by his dad to a deacon in the Aaronic Priesthood at Church. He will now participate in the passing of the Sacrament each Sunday. We are very proud of the young man he is becoming. I never imagined that my blue-eyed baby boy would ever turn twelve. Today happened to also be our Ward Conference, so a few of our beloved friends were also there and able to assist in Dallyn`s ordination. Making today extra special. We love you Dallyn!