THOSE Parents :)

 

I am one of THOSE parents and proud of it! (okay hear me out on this one)

 

My girls play rugby. That fact always surprises me some, since their parents have no athletic ability....

Last week they lost to the Port Alberni Team but Maddie and Bailey each scored a try (goal, I'm guessing) and were the only ones to score, get trys on their teams. And you know what, their parents missed it. Grant got stuck in a meeting and we arrived for the last three minutes of the game. I know, awesome parents....

 

 

 

I am down to two kids in band. The middle whined her way out last year, so that leaves my favourite last two.... Last night they were both playing in bands of the round. A concert showcasing all the beginning bands in the district. They had to beg and I almost sent Holly to chaperon them, but Grant and went. Yay a good parent moment! Notice we only have a picture of Dallyn, I actually forgot to get one of Alex...Bad parent. Grant played on his phone the whole time and I turned into a music snob, snickering at the clarinet squawks and the kids who couldn't keep tempo no matter how loud the drum kit was. All while trying to ignore the fact that I could feel the lower half of my body because we were sitting on bleachers....

 

 

 

Yup, call me lazy, overwhelmed or laid pack, I am one of THOSE parents and I am actually happy about it.

 

Last week my sister posted something about trying to keep up with all the expectations of other parents. Holiday class treats, neighbour gifts and church treats....attending every function, performance and gathering. She has three preschoolers and is just beginning to navigate the perfect PTA psychosis world, heaven help her. I am so glad I am almost through it...

 She is an awesome mom, but has absolutely no desire to keep up or compete with  THAT parents that does everything...

 

 

I used to be THAT parent...

 

I sent in treats for every holiday.

I attended every assembly, sporting event and activity, no matter what it took to get there.

Checked in with teachers weekly.

Helped in the class room, chaperoned every field trip...

 

I would dress the kids in coordinating outfits for Church, parades and holidays...

Taught perfect lessons with handouts...

 

Then something changed. I hit my wall. And by hit, I mean smacked into it at highway speeds...

 

I remember it pretty well, the year my Mom died and Alex started kindergarten. I simply couldn't do it All anymore. I remember getting called in to talk to Alex's teacher...She chastised me for all the days Alex had missed, it wouldn't be tolerated next year and told me to be a more checked in parent. (ok I am sure now that she wasn't quite that blunt, but that's how I felt) Funny thing is that same kid was student of the year last year, her last year in elementary school.

 

I was spread thin and broken and tired, so I was forced to rethink this whole parenting thing...Sure I could have continued to be THAT parent and put on the front of THAT perfect parent...But I wasn't fooling anyone,especially me or my kids...

 

I missed things sometimes...

Didn't always send them with treats on their birthdays...

Sometimes cancelled Parent Teacher Conferences...

 

And you know what, my kids still loved me and thrived, even with out THAT parent.

 

It took a long time to let go of THAT parent and give up on the guilt that came with it...I stopped feeling guilty by the time Dallyn started grade one....Me and guilt are not good friends.

 

I am now one of THOSE parents and proud of it. My kids actually embrace it too. I am happy to be far from perfect.

 

Oh I can still be THAT parent, sometimes and I can still kick butt with a glue gun, but only if I want too. If it fills my bucket, then great. But if it overwhelms me or wears me out or drains my bucket then NO it's not happening.

 

There is nothing wrong with being THAT parent, if it works for you. THAT parent simply doesn't work for me.

 

Think what you want but we can all be awesome parents, regardless if you are a THOSE or a THAT kind of parent. Our kids will survive...I promise, if mine can survive than any can :)