Saturday, July 5, 2014

A Hard-Fought Answer

 
"I have a family here on earth, they are so good to me, I want to share my life with them, through all eternity. "

As an older kid I hated this song, yup I said it...I hated it, we'd sing it and I'd roll my eyes. They certainly weren't talking about my family and I certainly had no desire to spend eternity with them....
 

Years passed...

I then got married and we had Holly and suddenly my little family changed my mind and for the first time I could imagine spending forever with someone. So,  Grant and I worked really hard and when Holly was six months old our little family was sealed in the Cardston temple. One of the sweetest moments of my life.



I have never regretted that decision. 

But I still roll my eyes. Yup I'm a mature, grown adult and I still roll my eyes...
I get MY family  but I struggle to understand the hurt and heartache I feel when I think about MY Mom and Dad....


Why were they ill?
Why did we/they have to endure so much?
Why was it, what it was?
Why?
Is a forever family is even possible for us?


The quest for answers has been a hard-fought battle... Sometimes the hurt too deep, to even ask the question.

Forgiveness and understanding have come in tiny pieces...

But there was one question I couldn't find an answer to...I prayed (more like tried to bargain with), looked for others who had walked a similar path, asked those I respected, what they thought...

Still no answer.

Until....

I had to get up before the birds were singing on Wednesday, to catch the ferry to Vancouver. I was humbled by the request to join our friends, when their daughter would be sealed to their eternal family. It was a beautiful day at the temple.

In the peace of that place, my hard-fought answer came...Just like that...an answer. I wasn't even asking.

I realize know, I was actually looking for an explanation, not really an answer...when I was willing to hear the answer without the explanation. The answer came. It was a humbling experience....

Ok so I'll probably still roll my eyes, occasionally...but there is a part of that song, I completely understand....

The Lord has shown me how I can...
 
Grateful to share such a special day with our friends and for the blessings of the temple.









 

0 comments:

Post a Comment