Every Step

The youngest three rug rats went to TREK (re enactment of the handcart pioneer trek of the 1850's)....

They walked 40 km in 3 days in pioneer dress and have the blisters, dirty clothes and tenacity to prove it.

At the Wednesday night fireside I was able to go and share a little bit about my Great Grandmothers who where in the first handcart company and related the strength and courage I find now in knowing my Grandmothers' story...If Ellen and Sophia could walk across the plains, I can certainly take one more difficult step with faith, now.

 

It was a privilege to spend time with our youth, they truly are amazing. The Spirit was so strong among them. It was an honour to be there.

 

 All three walked every step. Madison did so with massive blisters and refused to give up, other leaders were surprised at her strength, I just smiled.

A quote from my talk..... "We are all required to make journeys of faith. That is the gospel plan. Our path may not be crossing an ocean or ...... But whatever it is, it will demand faith in every footstep. Years from now your grandchildren will tell with amazement stories of your choices which changed their lives. You will be called their pioneers. Have you ever thought that as you step into the unknown you are showing others the way? "
By Bonnie D. Parkin

 

 We love Nanaimo Stake. We love trek. We love Grandma Sophia and Grandma Ellen.

Breaking Point

We have loved sharing our lives on this blog....It has been a vehicle that warmed hearts and fashioned friends and we have had wonderful experiences. It was never intended to replace family interactions or be the all encompassing full story bible truth of our daily lives.

I never thought I would be scrutinized or that it would cause hard feelings or fuel gossip.

Over the last few days it has become clear that we need to put this blog on hold and take a break for several weeks, maybe more.

We need privacy and time.  

I will continue to blog privately on In the Quiet Heart  http://krazyheart.blogspot.ca

If you would like an invite please message me your email, privately on FB

Thanks for understanding, we will be back!

Juggling Chainsaws, Chasing a Miracle

We can deal with the trials and hard things that come our way....we have for years and always manage to land on our feet, eventually...Cause we're strong and stubborn like that...

We are again, standing at the beginning...or middle...or end, I really don't know, of some really hard things. Despite doing everything in our power to acknowledge,  support and treat an illness not one of you would ever ask for, we have yet to find any (lasting) stability. Frustration, fear or bitterness gets us nowhere. All we can do is keep our feet moving, chasing a hopeful miracle.

We often feel like we are juggling chainsaws or swimming with very hungry sharks.... yeah and I'm not good with power tools or things that can eat me in the ocean, ask Grant.

So we make a lot of mistakes, doing the best we can with our hard things...I'm positive its cause I still can't find the manual called: 'My husband's a superhero and I have too many  a lot of kids and I have anxiety issues I have too much anxiety about to deal with...for Dummies' ...the librarian had a perplexed look when I asked :)

I can deal with my life....

What I really struggle with is other peoples opinion and attitudes of our trials.....and I don't have the energy left for that...

So if I send you a message on FB...it's cause I don't feel like sobbing through our phone conversation and not because I am trying to be rude.

or don't return your calls all together....it may be more than I can handle at the moment.

or don't give you every nitty-gritty detail in timely updates...its probably cause my Superman has asked for privacy and I may not trust you with all the information, this is my family, not a circus side show to be gossiped about.

Even in this crazy whirl wind I know three things...I love my husband, my kids rock and we are watch over every single day.

Honouring Dad, Sew.

So I was wasting time on Pinterest {story of my life} and came across...

 Alzheimer's Activity Aprons ....

(dementia, Alzheimer's, brain injury... anyone who spends most of their time sitting) 

I loved the concept, but was surprised at how expensive they are, for a rather plain apron...so I thought I can make that!

And then thought it would be a great way to honour my Dad (he had dementia), I've been searching for something for a long time, and there it was :)...

I remember my Dad was constantly fiddling and fidgeting...and asking for his keys and wallet ...

So I searched the dollar stores and second hand stores over the last week....

 

 

And today I was able to finish one for a woman....

 

A pocket and coin purse, a string of beads, a zipper pocket that I will put a stuffie inside, a measuring tape, a clear pocket for a photo of loved-ones and different textured fabric squares.
I reinforced everything and made it as washable as possible.

For the male version I will add a wallet and keys and lose the pink and purple :).

I plan on making four to start and then go from there :)

So if you know of someone who needs one...email me, I will gladly make one and send it for nothing :) Just a way of saying thank you to my Dad, for bailing us out countless times :)

What's Wrong With Me?

What's wrong with me????

 I didn't post these pictures from Bailey's grad and almost deleted them entirely when I was editing them....

All people are going to think is...."Man she's gotten fat and that lazy eye and her ____ and_____and_____..." I even pictured a particular person saying those exact things I was thinking...and I couldn't being myself to post them....

As a young kid I was different and I knew it, but I never once remember feeling ashamed that I wore those glasses or giant corrective shoes or  had a bad poodle perm or took the short bus to school.... I was a complete nerd and often a target but wore my nerd-um with honour. It never bothered me...

 

So what's wrong with me now? Where did that self confidence go?

It doesn't make a lot of sense...

 

See I have wonderful friends.

 

Ones that run marathons. Ones that perform in front of sold out crowds. One's that like motherhood. Ones that can out craft me. Ones that are ultra organized. Ones that are funnier than a redneck comedian.

And I have never felt an ounce of judgement from any of them

 

It wasn't until yesterday, I kind of put it all together...

 

One of my kids came to me and said "I know (unnamed sibling) will never tell you this but (unnamed person) says (stuff) to (unnamed sibling) all the time and has for a long time.

 

The (unnamed person) was the exact person I had pictured in my mind saying identical things about

me the week before while editing pictures.

This made me so sad...

I have never thought those things about someone else, let alone said them. So why was it okay for me to think them about myself now...and even if someone thinks them why should it matter?

 

Well it doesn't.

This is me.

 

 

 

 

Any criticisms are a reflection on YOU NOT ME.

 

 

Trek Clothing Marathon

The trek clothing marathon is finished!!! Four girls and one boy have two complete outfits each and another girl has two bonnets. So that's 10 bonnets, 10 shirts, 8 skirts, 8 aprons, 8 bloomers, 2 pairs of trousers with suspenders, 2 bandanas and one far from authentic straw cowboy hat...And we still have more than two weeks until trek...Yay me!

 

I kept losing pieces I had already worked on, so I decided to spend the last two days and just get it finished. Plus I suspected a mutiny if one more rug rat stepped on a pin :) 

 

 

In all honest I totally cheated on most of it. I come from the keep it simple, school of thought and not the authentic, the pioneers didn't have elastic or Velcro or power.

 

 So, I bought all the shirts at the second hand store and just took the collar off a few of them. I found all but two skirts there as well and altered each one. Lengthening the bottom or tightening the waist. The other two skirts I doctored a knit maxi skirt pattern only slightly and they worked great...I found most of the aprons and only really sewed 4 of them and all of the bloomers are just hemmed cotton pj bottoms, also found at the thrift store. I did sew every single bonnet, odd you can't seem to find those outside of Utah ;)

 

I didn't mind the work at all...just paying it forward. I have never forgotten all the skating carnival costumes and Moroni's Quest costumes and prior trek outfits sewn for our family, when I was still terrified of a sewing machine :) Plus I know what it feels like when small stuff is tipping point and this was a simple way I could help.

 

Bring on trek!

Wild Westcoast Weekend With Whales

Sunday we surprised the rug rats with a trip to Ucluelet and most of them didn't even figure out where we were going until we hit the Pacific Rim Park Junction.... {when in fact that they should have figured it out by the time we passed Sprout Lake...geniuses I tell ya :)}

 

We made a quick stop at Wickaninnish beach to stick our toes in the water...

 Love this Alex taking it all in...Madison leaping into the water ...Dallyn shivering cause the water ain't warm :)

 

This is how these two interrupt my "Don't get wet!"..... {A & B in the back ground impressed as always :)}

 

We then headed to Al & Leslie's {love these guys!} for the night...Dinner, Dallyn just about jumped on a dying seal {nature can be sad} and roasting marshmallows...then we surprised the kids even more Monday morning....

Whale Watching on a Zodiac! Holly and Tyler joined us....

 

 What else are you supposed to do in survival suits? :)

 

Ready to set sail...

 

Within 10 minutes we spotted a momma bear and her cub, 30 eagles feeding on the beach and our first gray whale...

Which was awesome and cool, but then we heard that another captain had spotted the resident L pod of orcas, so we took off. "Its going to be rough and you are going to get wet!" {was a complete understatement, but worth every minute}See...

 

 for the next hour we rode the heavy chop among the L pod....

 

 

For a while we were getting to wet for pictures and what Grant captured on fill was only a tiny portion of what we witnessed

Complete breech ...it happened countless times, they were so playful in the heavy surf.

 All on their backs slapping their tails on the surface, our tour guide had never seen this many do it at once before.

 Just an amazing day!

 

 Soaking wet and couldn't be happier!

Subtidal Adventures is amazing and we loved our guide Wendy, best trip ever. Honestly in the top of my favourite days ever.